Letting go of needing to know "HOW"

Are you accustomed to, or even attached to, knowing HOW things happen? This scientific mindset is useful in some situations, but I've found that when it comes to imagining a different life, creating a different vision, and acting in ways that are new and perhaps uncomfortable at first, holding on to the need to know "how" actually holds us back. I've been practicing holding a clear intention, keeping my energy open and flowing (by lots and lots of letting go of objects, obligations, guilt, and responsibility for other people's reactions), AND consciously releasing my need to know how things would unfold. The results? More amazing than I could have ever planned myself. I dare you to see what happens when you play with this concept in your own life...

What's the real fear standing between you and your goal?

Ever notice the voice that plays in your head after something happens in your life? You set a goal. You make it. What do you say to yourself?

You set a bigger goal. This time, you don't make it.  Now what do you say to yourself?

Are you setting goals that you know you can make, just so that you can avoid hearing what you'll say to yourself if you don't make it?

Without developing our tolerance for the risk of failure, we cannot stretch ourselves beyond the limits of what we've (a) accomplished in the past, or (b) been told by others that we're capable of accomplishing. This mindset leaves us with only the possibilities that have come before, and limits our ability to imagine brand new possibilities that have yet to come.

Start by paying attention to and noticing what you say to yourself in response to the things that happen in your life. Find out how you're motivating yourself, and imagine how this might change.

Calling All Voices: Four Questions To Change Your Life and Change The World

1. What delights you and brings you alive?2. What breaks your heart? 3. What does healing look like? 4. What one life-affirming action will you do beautifully and consistently, with love?

These four questions, conceived by my Real Speaking teacher Gail Larsen, capture the process of life coaching and personal transformation. They go to the heart of our own truth, and call us to look with clear eyes at what is etched in our souls.

For most of us, there is at least one of these questions we've been avoiding for most of our lives. It could be any one of them. Perhaps we have not allowed ourselves to want what we want, to feel the joy of being fully alive. Or maybe we have masked ourselves with a facade of "perkiness" and images of "happiness" which belie the deep caverns of unexpressed pain in our hearts. Even if we have done the work of facing our deepest truths, we can get lost there if we never look beyond these current realities into a vision of what our lives could be. And finally, all the dreaming and scheming in the world is no substitute for taking actions which are aligned with the truths we have uncovered and pointed in the direction of our brightest visions.

All of these four questions, taken together, outline a process of uncovering what is true for you, and becoming the most compassionate, loving witness of yourself that you will ever find. Until you fall deeply in love with all aspects of who you are, you will remain a stranger to the love that is already waiting patiently and silently to envelope you when you finally open to it.

It takes courage to ask these four questions, and answering them for yourself may seem difficult. In the words of the poet Rilke, "We must be unafraid of what is difficult. For all living things in nature must unfold in their particular way and become themselves at any cost and despite all opposition."

Like the salmon journeying home against the racing currents, or the butterfly emerging from its cocoon, or the roots of a grapevine tunneling through layers of dry earth to tap the deepest source of nourishment, we each have a necessary process in which we build our muscles and find our flow. Trusting this process we will discover the beauty we call life.

A new offering in August! IMPROVisE YOUR LIFE with Music Improvisation

Join me at the Cradle of Manifestation this August for a brand new offering, integrating the best practices of mind AND body so you can enter each week with clarity of intention AND action. Check out my introductory video blog about the offering below. And if you're ready to enroll, visit the registration page here.

IMPROVisE YOUR LIFE with Music Improvisation

[nggallery id=31] Download class flyer pdf

5-class series

Begins Monday, August 2, 2010, 3:00pm - 4:30pm, at The Cradle of Manifestation, 2483 Old Middlefield Way, Suite 150, Mountain View, CA

Start your week with an intention AND practice of living creatively.

If you are ready to take action in your life in a new direction, if you are facing a transition and need to gain a vision of greater possibilities, if you are simply wanting to feel more at peace with the changes happening in your world...this class is for you!

I have found that simply talking about and thinking about change is not enough to bring us the results we desire in our lives. We need to combine intentional thinking with mindful actions. How do we begin to do that?

This 5-class series will deliberately combine MIND and BODY work in the practice of music improvisation, with the intention to improve your experience of daily life.

You will...

  • Invigorate your body, calm your mind, and experience greater clarity as you begin to take action throughout the week.
  • Achieve greater awareness of your own thoughts and awaken to new possibilities through deep listening and meditative sound-making.
  • Learn and practice small daily rituals that will help you begin to live and act more creatively.

I will facilitate as we REFLECT on our intentions for the week and PRACTICE the core elements of free music improvisation:

  • listening
  • play
  • repetition
  • emptying the mind
  • letting go of attachment to outcomes
  • offering quality sounds
  • allowing silence

**Please bring a notebook or journal and a pen.

**Musical instruments are welcome but NOT REQUIRED. Some simple instruments will be provided for your use.

Enter into this practice and watch your life IMPROVE with IMPROV.

Mondays, 3:00pm - 4:30pm, August 2 - August 30, 2010, at The Cradle of Manifestation

Class Fees:

$30/single class paid in advance

$35/single class paid at the door (cash or check only)

$140/5-class series pre-paid at or before first session

Single Class or Series?